Diversity. Inclusion. Most people will tell you that they believe in these things. Most people believe that they live it. Most believe that everyone should be treated equally… until there is something about treating another person equally that makes them feel uncomfortable.
I’m uncertain who coined this, but there is a saying: “When you are accustomed to privilege, equality feels like oppression.” Privilege can be understood by asking yourself, “Have I ever wondered if someone would accept me because of something I can’t change about myself, such as skin colour, sexual orientation, gender identity, or physical disability?” If the answer is no, you are accustomed to privilege.
Although I am indeed gay and am hearing all kinds of people comment about that right now, I still have other privilege granted by the way our society has been unfairly constructed to favour people with light-coloured skin.
Perhaps people cannot be faulted for privilege that’s granted to them by virtue of the family they were born into, the religion they were taught, or the colour of their skin. But we are at fault when someone presents us with their discriminatory experience and we dismiss it because it’s not like anything we currently know or believe to be true. As the years have passed, even issues that people once felt were the “will of God” to stand against have changed.
For instance, we learned over time that it is not okay to treat others differently because of the colour of their skin or to deny those with disabilities access to opportunities made available to those of us with bodies that happen to function without issue.
We live in a society where power imbalance has always been normal, and this has created biases in us that we’re often not even aware of. It makes sense, then, that certain privilege (such as belonging to a historically popular religion) skews our ability to recognize a violation of a human right that isn’t threatened in our own lives.
There is significant re-search to show that LGBTTQ* folks are at higher risk of bullying and hate crimes than heterosexual people. I believe that fear and lack of understanding about the experience of LGBTTQ* people factors into the lack of acceptance we too often encounter.
One point that is chronically misunderstood is that being LGBTTQ* is not just about our sexuality—just as heterosexual people do not exclusively identify themselves by their sexuality. It’s unfortunate that we are labelled based on whom we are attracted to. I believe this takes a person’s individuality out of the mix in a subliminal way that is unfortunate and misleading.
To those who are uneducated about the natural state of being LGBTTQ*, these labels shine the spotlight where it need not be. I also believe that labels greatly increase the length of time it takes for us to recognize our intrinsic value—separate from sex, and separate from another. I do believe that one day we will not need these labels, in the same way that heterosexual people do not feel the need to use a label for themselves.
Identifying as LGBTTQ* is about being human. It is about finding a way to risk being vulnerable with the world to be authentic. It is then about going out into the world, unabashedly, as ourselves. Regardless of sexual orientation, these are difficult and challenging tasks.
For an LGBTTQ* person, these are things that have to be done every day, in every setting. These things are difficult right now in the environment we have in rural Manitoba and with the homophobia and discrimination that so many in the LGBTTQ* community have to battle.
We need to recognize the fear we experience when our privilege is threatened. We need to educate ourselves to understand what makes us fearful in order to overcome that fear.
The next time someone says they are being intimidated or asked to change something about themselves that is impossible to change, listen. And never miss an opportunity to use your privilege to stand up for another human being’s rights.
