COMMENTARY HSD: Please Acknowledge Our Existence

“He’s so gay.”

“Dude, I think he just checked you out. That’s messed up.”

“No girl would go out with him so he probably has to be gay.”

“What a faggot.”

It’s been years since I’ve heard these words directed towards me, just loud enough that those saying them knew I would hear. I’ll admit I don’t think about them that often anymore, but every once in a while, some event will trigger the replay button and I’ll hear them over and over again like a broken record, causing old wounds I thought were permanently healed to reopen.

The commentary that has come out of the Hanover School Division regarding current LGBTQ policies in its schools has reopened many of those wounds. 

I’m a 29-year-old gay man who grew up in Niverville. Years ago, when I walked the halls of Niverville Collegiate Institute, I heard those exact phrases all too often. I knew I was gay then, but wasn’t “out.” Why would I admit it to anyone? The challenges I faced in school were already hard enough when people only suspected I was gay; how much worse would they get if I confirmed the truth? It was much easier to keep all those hurtful words to myself and go about my studies as if nothing was happening. And yet, the feelings of isolation and loneliness that followed were drowning me. There was no place to turn to for support. Undoubtedly, the vast majority of LGBTQ students in Hanover today remain “safely” in the closet, avoiding the fear of what might happen if they were to admit anything out loud.

Sadly, little has changed in our schools today. While much of Canadian society has accepted the LGBTQ community’s rights to live as all Canadians do, the words spoken by HSD’s Board of Trustees demonstrate that southeastern Manitoba is still an area where the concerns of the LGBTQ community remain largely misunderstood. There have been inexcusable connections to cancer and the residential school system. Sexual orientation was naïvely called a “lifestyle.” Trustees referred to the entire LGBTQ community in southeastern Manitoba as one person with a personal agenda. Not only do these comments continue to perpetuate the climate of intolerance in our communities, but they've left most students in the LGBTQ community feeling alone and abandoned. I know this because it left me feeling the same, and my high school days are long behind me.

According to the Canadian Climate Survey on Homophobia, 59 percent of LGBTQ students in schools today are verbally harassed, 25 percent are physically harassed, and 31 percent are harassed online. Only seven to eight percent of their heterosexual peers experience these same forms of harassment. 73 percent of LGBTQ students feel unsafe in schools, and 51 percent feel like they are not accepted, compared to 19 to 20 percent of their heterosexual peers. 48 percent of all students in schools report hearing homophobic slurs daily. According to a 2007 study, 33 percent of LGBTQ students attempt suicide compared to seven percent of their heterosexual peers. Furthermore, according to the National School Climate Survey by GLSEN (Gay, Lesbian, and Straight Education Network), 28 percent of LGBTQ students will drop out of school because of bullying. In stark contrast, Stats Canada reports that the national dropout rate is eight percent.

These numbers are staggering. Conservative estimates based on years of professional research would suggest that there are roughly 300 to 400 LGBTQ students currently attending HSD schools. This isn’t a concern about just one student, but many. What message are we, as a community, sending these students when we refuse to acknowledge that their experiences in the school system are vastly more challenging than for other students? What message are we sending them when we refuse to listen to the undeniable truths they try and share with us? As a community, do we want to continue to be part of the problem facing these students, or part of the solution?

Steinbach recently released a statement pertaining to the upcoming pride march in its city, claiming it is “a welcoming community to all” and that “all people, including those who identify as LGBTQ, deserve to be treated with love and respect at all times.” Their words sound open and inviting, but their actions that continue to ignore and discriminate against LGBTQ people are louder. 

The LGBTQ community is only asking that HSD acknowledge their existence in schools, in a way that brings about mutual respect and an understanding of differences; the same respect Manitoba teachers already instruct students about when discussing other religions, cultures, and people. This is Canada, after all, and we live in an open, multicultural society that not only rejects discrimination against any person for being who they are, but encourages and embraces the unique differences that make up the fabric of our great country.

So I’ll end with what I feel is the most pertinent question as we continue to respectfully discuss this issue: if changing Hanover School Division policies to address topics of inclusion and acceptance of LGBTQ people is not the first step in becoming a more accepting and tolerant community, what is? How can we all work together to move forward?